Connection

Is staying emotionally connected as easy as it looks in the movies? And if it is, why do so many celebrities split up? Maybe it takes more than one romantic gesture, one big fight, and one big make up to have that happily ever after. Maybe it's more of the little things that we don't see in Hollywood. Maybe it's doing the dishes for your spouse because you know that they hate doing them. Or even just spending the night on the couch eating microwave popcorn and laughing together. 

As I have gotten older my idea of romance has changed. Hollywood romance is a fun fantasy, but I think of romance as more of what I described before. Serving others and spending time together. Neither of which are my love language, but both of which sound like my idea of a good time. 

Staying connected through the changes of life doesn't have to be difficult. You have to take the good times with the bad times and be willing to work on things that change. Maybe ten years down the line, it makes more sense for husband to make dinner a couple times a week, and for wife to mow the lawn. Connection has to evolve with life. 

A good example of this is my parents. I was lucky enough to have a stay at home mom when I was little. My dad ran his own business, and was gone a lot when I was little, because the demands of being self employed never seem to end. As we got older, it made more sense for my mom to go help my dad while all the kids were at school so he could come home earlier and spend more time at home. Now that all the kids are out of the house, she helps him every day, which gives them the freedom to travel together, while still giving them the chance to spend all day together. As they have gotten older, their lives have changed, but they still spend that quality time together. And yeah, sometimes that quality time is working. But spending that much time together has helped them be able to recognize each others needs more. Their connection has grown since they have become empty nesters. 

Pay attention to one another. Don't let life distract you so much that you forget to enjoy each others company.